Single's Awareness Day
Single’s Awareness Day also the Holiday known as Valentine’s Day is almost here and it is a day that can bring a variety of mixed emotions for many people. Those who are widowed can re-experience the memory of the loss of their loved one on Valentine’s Day. Those who are divorced, experiencing separation, or marital distress can have feelings of angst as Valentine’s Day can serve foster regret and resentment. Valentine’s Day can especially be hard for anyone experiencing a recent break up or let down in a personal relationship.
I know I have personally STRUGGLED with Valentine’s Day for YEARS!!!! So much so, that I would wear ALL BLACK on Valentine’s Day in protest of the holiday (dramatic I know). I often viewed Valentine’s Day as a reminder of the love I was lacking in my life due to the absence of a romantic relationship. However, after navigating this holiday for many years I have gained some insight into ways to adapt a healthy perspective of Valentine’s day and I have some tips to help YOU embrace the “Day of Love” and navigate it in a healthy way.
1. Recognize the VARIETY of love that is in your life. Many forms of love exist that extend beyond romantic love. This includes:
-Your love for God and God’s love for you
-Love for your family and your family’s love for you
-Love within your friendships (this can also be similar to the type of love you share for your family).
2. ENHANCE and develop the love that is in your life. Water the seeds that you want to see grow. Meaning, that if you want to experience better relationships with yourself and others invest into those relationships.
-Arrange weekly time to talk with friends and family (stay away from touchy or controversial subjects)
-Go places or join groups that help you build community and connection (Join the cross fit group, join and participate at your local church/place of worship, join the community choir, etc)
3. Embrace SELF love. Use the day to pamper and treat yourself WELL. The common denominator in any relationship: romantic, family, friendship, or otherwise is YOU. Intentionally do something that is personally enjoyable and good to YOU.
4. Guard yourself from triggers. Maybe it is triggering for you to view social media tributes to relationships. If that is the case, take a break from social media for the day. Instead of going to see the new movie in the evening, perhaps go during the matinee time when there are less couples, etc.
5. Do something for or with others. One of the best ways to redirect yourself is by focusing on and serving the needs of others. This can be done by sending a Valentine’s Day card to a window. Pampering your children on Valentine’s Day or spending time with someone elderly or a grandparent.
Long story short, redefine Valentine’s Day. Make the “Day of Love” work for you by embracing and enhancing things that cultivate love in your life.